A while ago, I confided with some folks that things were getting a bit hard on the money side. My sick leave is meagre at best. It’s not enough for all the medication - not just for the fibromyalgia - I take during the month and for my monthly appointment and related costs (like gas and tolls). The wife works - and a lot, on top of that. Since I was forced to go on sick leave, she’s had to support all the costs like rent, food, and utility bills… You can only stretch the money so much before it rips.
A GoFundMe fundraiser, a Paypal account, and some other options were proposed by the people I confided with. I discarded them at the time and did so for a few months because, well, I felt ashamed. Still do, honestly. Never thought I would go through shit like this, struggling a ton to support myself and not being able to do it. It’s like a headshot in my pride and in my dreams.
Eventually, I conceded.
When I created the fundraiser on GoFundMe, the platform asked me to specify an amount for it. I couldn’t skip it because it’s a mandatory field. After a few minutes of staring at the screen, I wrote €300. This is, give or take a few Euros, the money I spend on medicine and the appointment every month.
On the 24th of May, close to 22h30m, I posted a tweet linked to the GoFundMe fundraiser. Another post was published on the Fediverse with that link and another link to my Paypal account. I re-shared it a few times on the Fediverse because I have a small network there, so I wouldn’t expose myself much, but I only re-shared it once on Twitter, past 2 in the morning, because my network there is far more extensive and that would mean too much divulgence.
Three days later, I had €30 or €40 donated, which was more than I frankly thought I would be able to get. It was enough for two packages, 20 pills each, of Tramadol 200mg; or for part of the fuel to go to the transcranial magnetic stimulation appointment.
Five days after the first tweet, Pedro - who I’ll never be able to thank enough - retweeted it and tagged some users. It exploded. When I woke up and saw the notifications, unexpectedly, I had €200 or around that. I was astounded by the positive feedback and the donations I received and appalled because many people now knew I was having a hard time and was failing at life.
It’s hard not to feel like a failure in a situation like this.
This fundraiser has transcended my wildest dreams by far! When I had €30 or €40, I had already deemed it a success. Now, as I write this with some kind of mist in my eyes, I have almost 3 times the goal I had to define for the fundraiser when I was creating it, plus some donations via Paypal.
Thank you so so much to everyone who shared the tweets and donated. And a special thank you to Pedro: I’ll never be able to repay your kindness.
Photo from Unsplash
